1: "Top of a high tower with a sniper's rifle" Trouble-shooter

Come on... We know that walls have ears, we know that one of them might be listening but we all know this one.

And what's more, they know we know...

The one who nobody will sit directly opposite or right next to in a meeting, the one surrounded by a cold zone that you kind of get the feeling a ghost must be occupying. This one doesn't perspire except for a single bead of sweat that forms high on the left temple only to trickle ever so slowly down towards the eyebrow.

You know them. They know you're thinking of them. Resistance is futile.

Here's the facts. Even consultants get things wrong. It can be because of Bad Executives or from failure to follow our Enterprize Initiative Process or failure to adhere to the Client Recognition Analysis Protocol but the bottom line is that sometimes, they get into deep, deep shit and have no choice but to dig themselves out. Which isn't easy when you're swimming in faeces. That's when they call for this psychopath; someone who can cut through the crap (hey, did you guess we were building to that one? Huh? Did ya? Did ya?)

Somewhere in the far recesses of consultant headquarters is the office of this dangerous loner. Based upon an individual knowledge management database that's hidden behind security firewalls and underfed doberman pinschers, this iceberg maintains files on every one of his colleague co-compatriots.

Brought into a project to identify what went wrong, who is most likely to receive the finger of blame and whether they are expendable or not, this psychopath isn't averse to sitting in meetings and chuckling behind one hand as they contemplate how far the blood would spatter up the meeting room wall.

Often seen with:
  • A PDA, taking notes in the corner
Tell-tale signs:
  • That single drop of sweat high on the left of the forehead
  • A quiet, manic laugh that emerges almost as a breath while someone else is talking in a meeting
  • Smiles throughout meetings, like a catalogue model permanently on display
  • Good abs
Favourite Saying:
  • "And you did what next... What exactly..."
Puts faith in:
  • Personal files relating to the sexual exploits of senior partners (involving donkeys - although we've never got close enough to the files to be able to prove that obviously, so we'll have to say that this is an alleged piece of satire, not something based upon real life in any way whatsoever... Can we have those photos and the back now? And what about the negatives?)